Wednesday, April 05, 2006

An Open Letter to the Advertisers of Axe Body Spray

Dear Mr./Mrs./Ms. Maker of the Advertisements of Axe Body Spray:

I am writing on behalf of the public to please stop airing your ads for Axe body spray on television. I believe they encourage an unnecessarily excessive use of your product, thus offending olfactories everywhere.

I understand that people wear your product to smell more appealing to the human race. But, do you have to make ads where people are applying it in such a liberal manner? Isn't one quick spritz enough? Do you really think that people will pour it all over themselves?

Yes, you do think that. And yes, people do it. I just wish they wouldn't do it so often in public. I smell it everywhere. Eight feet ahead of me in line at the grocery store, twelve feet ahead of me while walking through a shopping mall, and sometimes I smell it when there's no one around at all.

I know you have to make a profit. It's fine if people want to wear Axe body spray. But, please, on behalf of the sense of smell of all Americans, encourage responsible usage of your product. That's all I'm asking.

Thank you.


Concerned American

1 comment:

Ticket 4 Two said...

Ohhhh...hotttt boddddd. I waaant you're bodddd.....

HATE IT AS WELL. Want to rip the TV out of the wall and throw it through the nearest window, hopefully also disposing of a nearby disease-infested rat. That is my wish.